Kim

It's taken months to get to a place where I could do this. I have had many losses, we all have them, but there's something about losing a contemporary, someone you were once close to, and for no good reason that can possibly be understood, that reaches us so deeply and in a particular way.

I think I met Kim very early in my first year of law school. I clerked with her, studied for exams and for the bar with her, let off steam with her. We were close for many years but as close friends sometimes do, we drifted apart. Her friends gave her a very special sendoff and allowed me to speak. It was a party, by Kim's request -- with a Hawaiian theme, and margaritas. I decided I would go ahead and post my remembrance of her here.

Today, I'm thinking of blonde hair and freckles and an irrepressible smile. A wicked sense of humor. Determination. Independence. A deep appreciation for beauty, especially in the form of cats, gardens or flowers. Mostly, for the last few days, I've been looking at a picture of Kim and me taken when we graduated from law school. She's beautiful in that photo -- in spite of the 80's hairdo and questionable "fashion". I love that she's wearing one of those Hawaiian flower tiaras, which I'm sure there's a special name for that's eluding me. She had specially ordered flowers from Hawaii for both of us.

I cannot imagine getting through law school without Kim. Although I can't recall exactly when we met, I suspect it was either in Professor Knock's summer criminal law class or in one of the core classes in the fall of First Year -- that would have been Settle's property class, DeLong's contract class, or Hauck's civ pro class. I have a feeling it was civ pro because that class was impenetrable agony and everyone in it would have been reaching out for support. Looking back, it just seems as though she was always there -- part of that small group of friends that becomes such a significant part of your life because your shared experiences are so intense.

Soon enough, we were 2Ls working in the Torts Division, along with Valerie and Doug A. A few other law clerks came and went, but the four of us were there together for I think nearly two years. So that was two years of putting up with bizarre research requests, unreasonable deadlines, and what seems, looking back, like an unholy amount of atmospheric testosterone. Kim turned out to be a prodigious legal researcher and she had a phenomenal memory. She became the go-to person for coming up with a way to tackle those thorny and "unique" legal issues that made our heads ache. We all worked pretty hard, we learned quite a bit, and we laughed a lot. Kim had a terrific, observant sense of humor and probably no one would be shocked to learn that a healthy proportion of our laughs came at the expense of the Torts lawyers. At the same time, many of those same attorneys came to appreciate Kim's dedication, work ethic, and research skills and some became longtime fans and supporters.

At the beginning of our third year, Kim, Doug and I went to see the movie The Commitments at the theatre at Tacoma Mall (no longer there). I don't know if she picked the film, but she might have, because she loved movies and music and had definite opinions about both. Anyway, the movie was hilarious and full of terrific Irish renditions of American soul music. We all got a huge kick out of it and a certain amount of release.There was a definite sense of getting ourselves ready for that final stretch.

I particularly remember studying for the bar together. She more or less spoon fed me what little I have ever known about commercial paper, a class I didn't take, over coffee and eggs at Dennys. There was a commercial paper question on the exam, too. Without her, I wouldn't have had a prayer.

I have another memory of going with Kim and another friend on a garden tour on Bainbridge Island a few years later. It's something I probably wouldn't have done on my own. I'm not sure if Kim found it inspiring or was just appreciating the glorious weather and the gardens, but I could see she was enjoying the experience immensely. It was only after she left her apartment and had her own place, first in Tacoma then in Dupont, that I realized she was a born gardener herself.

I feel fortunate that Valerie and I had an opportunity to visit with Kim at Virginia Mason recently. I had not seen her in some time and yes, she was weak and had been through so much. But as with all good friends, you just pick up where you left off. Her spirit and her ability to recall details of the past amazed me then and they amaze me still. Now, though, I'm remembering an earlier time -- say about 1989, one of the summers during law school and in many respects, a world that no longer exists -- when the load of being a summer law clerk was considerably lightened by lunch out on Fridays, and lunch out meant margaritas. Fridays may not have been our most productive days but they more or less became a tradition. It's lovely to think that, with Kim, the margarita tradition continued. We should never underestimate the pleasure to be had by the opportunity to relax and visit with a good friend and a good margarita. I don't expect I'll ever drink another margarita without thinking of her with great affection.

As our friend Val says, she was part of my journey. And she struggled with her health and mobility all that time in a very matter of fact and tough way. Any one of these set backs, as other friends have said, would have felled a lesser person. She weathered them all. I miss her and I honor her.

Kim Marie Qually

September 15, 1951~ November 17, 2009